iMac iTablet iSlated for iRelease in iMarch says iWSJ

Alex Zaharov-Reutt
Tuesday, 05 January 2010 05:32

Opinion and Analysis

OMG, it’s all over the news – Apple’s iPad / iPhonePro / iMacBookiTouch / iThingamii / iJobs is still not available, but the hypish rumour-mongers over at the WSJ say it’s coming March – wOOt!

Ho-hum. Yep, it’s another amazing iApple iRumor over the iMpending release of an iApple something or other without a physical iKeyboard.

Given the endless hype and hoopla over a device that everyone is hoping will knock their socks off, it’s no surprise that the iSlate rumour mill is going overboard, once again without Apple needing to publicly do anything.

All of that pre-supposes, of course, that Apple really is going to deliver an announcement at the end of January, and then start shipping the Jesus Tablet in March, with the March shipping date supposedly the big discovery by the WSJ, along with a supposed US $1000 price point.

Otherwise it’s gonna be the biggest anti-iClimax since those stupid people that buy Viagra from spamvertisements discover the pills they’ve bought at those cheap, cheap prices are, like, fake.

We’ve all heard that Steve Jobs is going to surprise us all with his new iSteve tablet, with rumours of keyboards that can pop-up out of the screen, inbuilt webcams for iChat sessions, the possibility of dual iPhone OS and Mac OS X operating systems and more.

Heck, you can say or write just about anything when it comes to the iJobs because it’s not here yet, and until it is, iSpeculation is tons of fun.

The iSteve really has to be special. The world has had tablets for years, and although I personally think today’s tablet PCs are the way all portable PCs should be configured, most other people around the world don’t think so, or sales would have been very iDifferent.

The JooJoo clearly sucks. It seems to be little more than a glorified browser. No wOOts there. I can get a cheap netbook (with or without touchscreen) and do a gazillion times more. 

No, a portable computer needs to be a portable computer, and there needs to be a level of smooth and sweet sophistication only previously seen in devices like the iPhone itself.

Sure, the Android devices come quite close… but much too far away for any cigars. Smoking’s not good for you, anyway. 

The wait until January 26th still seems like a bazillion years away, and March further still!

Oh well. There’s the Consumer Electronics Show and all its surprises along with the Google Nexus One to keep us entertained until the second/third/fourth/fifth coming of Apple’s tablet technology makes its long awaited and predicted appearance.

iCan’twait, but like everyone else, will have to.

iSigh.